advance warning incase the ‘read more’ doesn’t work …there’s quite a few photos in this post. not loads by some peoples standards, but worth a mention.
for various reasons i haven’t done a snapshots post for a while. mostly because i usually put them together on a thursday, and my thursdays lately have been busy so by the evening i was too tired to do anything but laze.
other reasons being i broke my tooth a couple weeks ago and it’s been such a stress trying to get it sorted. it got infected so i’ve only been off the antibiotics a couple days now. unfortunately it needs extracting and i can’t afford that right now (i need to be sedated), so i either wait months and months – by which time it could become infected again – or get it sorted sooner spending money i ..just don’t have. so yeah that’s been time consuming and stressful!
which leads onto mental health. worrying about my tooth just triggered a lot of panic and anxiety, which seemed to start a landslide. i’ve been on a bit of a downhill slope again latelyanyway, but i’ve had moments of hope too. a little earlier in the year i finally asked for help and told my doctor i wanted/needed therapy. i don’t know the NHS services anywhere else in the UK, but here (or in cardiff at least) i was offered 6, hourly sessions. they helped but it just isn’t enough. i have a lot of issues i need to talk through with a professional! so i’ve been trying to get my head round not going to these sessions anymore. if i could afford private help i’d do it in a heartbeat now, but yeah. money i just don’t have.
feel like i’m waffling a bit, but it’s good to get some stuff out. i’ve had soooo much on my mind that i just cannot concentrate on much, but i feel like i’m starting to organise my mind clutter a bit.
firstly – and i know everyone will be saying this, but – HOW is it almost october? seriously though. i do love october though, and not just because it’s my birthday month. this year i’ll be turning 30, eek! that’s a big one.
autumn has always been my favourite season. even if everything else in my life is rubbish, the cool autumnal air, the colourful evening skies (esp when they’re purple), and the changing colours in nature all make it worthwhile.
this week has been pretty awful, mostly on the mental health front, but physically and emotionally too. i feel drained to my core.
but earlier this week i took my trusty tokina lens out for a walk (i wanted to use my helios but can’t find it!) and all the lovely autumnal colours and golden late afternoon sun made me feel so content for the rest of the day. so all my photos this week are from then. enjoy!
snapshots of my week – 30th september was last modified: 08:00 by laura redburn
due to a lot of joint pain, this week has been pretty uneventful. i’ve actually been pretty productive in terms of getting things on the to do list done, but it’s all pretty mundane stuff that no one really wants to hear about. still, feels good to get little aspects of your life organised, right? i wish i was one of those people that was more ‘on top’ of things but when you’re ill a lot and your brain doesn’t quite work as it should, its hard!
i know i must come off as lazy to some people (boyfriend included) but i always try my best and have good intentions at heart. it’s kind of hard to prove that though sometimes, isn’t it? i mean, sometimes i feel like i’m too hard on myself, but to an outsider, how are they possibly to know that? even if i voice it it still may seem like i’m making excuses. i don’t have the easiest body to live in, but, really, is that anyones problem but mine?
anyway, yes, i’ve also done a lot of thinking this week, ha!
hopefully next week will be a touch more eventful. i’ve (finally) shared some video snippets of the past couple of weeks, and i’ll try and get back into making videos more regularly again because i really do enjoy it.